Triathlons = Good Times

For the past month my wife and have been training sporadically for the Top Cop Triathlon in Temple Terrace. This triathlon consists of a .25 mile swim, 8 mile bike, and 3 mile run. It is referred to as a 'sprint' triathlon (a normal triathlon is 2.5 mile swim/156 mile bike/26 mile run). A co-worker of Claire's has managed to convince us to run in a few 5K races and gave us the nudge to sign up for the triathlon. Training wasn't supposed to be that complicated. Just swim some, do a little bit of biking, and run...right?

SWIMMING (SUCKS ASS)
We started swimming on Saturday afternoons and eventually added more days. The pool at Sulfur Springs is nice and not very crowded at night. Swimming really blew for me. For starters, I couldn't swim very far. Even though I am not a swimmer, I thought I could handle a few laps. I found I could only knock out maybe three or four laps before clinging to the sides for air. How embarrassing! I am a self-professed 'water-baby'. I've been known to swim/drift/float almost the entire length of the Ichetucknee River. The truth was this: I sucked at swimming. My swimming resume didn't really 'hold water' as they say. Of course, my goggles kept filling with water letting in the seemingly high concentrated chlorine into my eyes. That pissed me off. Worse, I tried to use a kickboard to no avail... I always seemed to die halfway down the middle of the lap. And finally I began to lose it when I looked over at my wife (former youth swim team member) cruising through her laps with apparent ease. I guess I just couldn't stand that she could whip me in something physical. Despite my jealousy, she taught me how to do a backstroke. I mostly just got water in my nose and mouth learning how, but I managed to get it down. The curses were flying out of my mouth with no restraint. Somehow I managed to get to my target goal of 18 laps with a combination of freestyle, backstroke, doggy-paddle, and drowning.

BIKING
Well, my bike had a flat till two days before training so I didn't really do much with that. I did bike for about 30 minutes once at USF's gym, but I'm not sure if it counted. Of note, our bikes our the popular mountain bike style, which don't really come in handy for a open road race.

RUNNING
I ran between two and five miles to train for this race. I've found a nice long loop in my neighborhood for the long run. For the short run, the track at Hillsborough High School (a few blocks from my house) is nice. However, you have to dodge field goals from punters on the football team and cheerleading practice.

RACE DAY
Claire and I got up at the crack of dawn. On a Sunday. She really hates that, since she works 8-4 everyday. With my student schedule, it's not a really big deal. I outfitted my SUV with our bikes, while Claire gathered our gear. I really like getting some 'utility' from that thing; I feel like it is earning it's keep. By the way, our 'gear' consisted of a two pairs of goggles, two towels, a Clif bar, a bottle of water, and a extra set of shoes. When we got to the race we had to 'stage' our bikes, shoes, etc. We noticed that most people had nice road bikes and felt embarassed by our lack of nice gear. To make us feel better, our friend's husband mentioned how slow we would be compared to the rest. I was mad until the bike portion, when a 60 year old guy who was about two minutes behind me in the swim went cruising by me like he was Lance Armstrong.

The morning of the race, Tampa was on the tail end of a cold front and it was around 58 degrees. In my tiny swimming/jogging shorts I wasn't feeling it. My collective balls shrank into my stomach when I looked at the pool. Luckily for me, the city planners of Temple Terrace managed give the citizens a heated pool. THANK THE GODS! So the swim was no problem. I was placed in the fifth heat. Claire went ahead of me and did very well: second out of her heat. Then I got in the water. I noticed that no one was doing the backstroke and decided I would have to doggy paddle if it came to that. However, when the gun sounded it lit something new in me: I became a rocket! Somehow I knocked out 9 laps of freestyle before changing to the breaststroke, which I only used for a few laps. I ended up doing .25 mile in 8:40 and tied for first in my heat. How nice is that?

The bike ride was nice and uneventful. As I mentioned, my mountain bike tires seemed to be made of glue and I was passed by several sketchy folks. I probably could have used some additional training but I did pretty decent considering that, had I owned a road bike I would have knocked about 4-5 minutes off my time at a minimum.

The one thing that took me by surprise was the transition from bike to run. I hadn't aticipated the difficulty of that enterprise. My legs felt like lead as I dismounted the bike and ran it back to the rack. The only highlight from my three mile jog was the fact that I passed that old 60 year old bastard who thought he was all hot shit on his bike. Claire met me near the end and urged me to run faster, but I only wanted to puke as I crossed the finish; somehow, I managed not to do that.

Yeah, sweet victory! My time of 1:06:42 netted me lovely trophy you see at top of the post. Even though there were only 4 guys in my age group, it felt good and has definitely made me a fan of these races. I talked to my gung-ho Marine buddy up in Pensacola. I think we should gather a bunch of his buddies and mine and meet for a race. Of course, we would put our own little twist on the whole thing. We would have to all wear Speedos the entire race and swim caps. Our noses would have a absurd amount of pink suntan lotion covering them. To top it off, we will carry a boombox with hits like "Chariots of Fire" and "Eye of the Tiger" playing. Coming soon to a race near you.